These past four weeks have been the strongest and most consistent I have felt in a very long time. My trip away really did bring me a spring in my step, recharged my batteries but more than anything I feel as though I have been brought back to life. As if the buzz from all that amazing nature around me, made me literally high on life. I finally feel as if I have been through the storms and now there is a lot of sunshine and just an energy to everything. I am trying not get carried away and believe that I am over the grief altogether. In fact there is not a fibre in my bone that will ever believe grief comes to an end, but I do finally feel like I can fully enjoy life once again and I am really taking care of myself. Like it is my instinctive to prioritise me and put grief second on my list, in full knowledge I know it will catch up with me sooner or later. It’s ok, grief is sitting beside me and it’s welcome there.
September 27th, 2021